Jeri-Rigged Body

It often amuses me to go to a doctor appointment - especially when it is a new doctor - to see what their reaction to my chart is. First off, I am a medical mystery on most parts. The number of times I have hear a doctor say, "Huh. Well, that's weird." is astronomical.

Secondly, out of all the medications I take on a regular basis, only one is being used for what it is "normally" prescribed for.

A typical conversation with a new doctor goes something like this:

"So how long have you had diabetes?"
"I don't."
"You don't?"
"Nope."
"Then why are you taking Metformin?"
"Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome."
"Oh." (pause) "And do you have a long history of addiction?"
"Heck no. I hate taking pills. And I don't do drugs."
"Um...."
"My pain management specialist prescribes that for my chronic back pain and bursitis."
"Ah." (longer pause) "Are the antihistamines for seasonal allergies or nasal allergies?"
"Neither. They treat my anxiety and depression."
"In addition to the anti-depressants?"
"Yep."
"Okay. When were you diagnosed with Fibromyalgia?"
"I haven't been. I take that for chronic nerve pain resulting from nerve damage in my spine."
(At this point, the doctor pauses, to gain a better mental footing.)
"Are you still taking the antibiotics?"
"Which ones do you have listed? The second or third round? Oh well, it doesn't matter. No. I'm not taking the antibiotics anymore. The specialist is waiting for me to schedule the surgery."

At this point, they generally give up trying to understand.

Nobody ever said I was normal....