Should Old Aquaintence Be Forgot?

I've been getting a lot of gossip lately about people who would consider themselves to be "former friends" of mine. I just have one thing to say about that. I don't have any "former friends". As far as I'm concerned, if any of these "former friends" who others seem to think I HATE came to me, I would treat them the same as any other friend of mine.

Maybe it's just me. I just don't like it when other people perpetuate a concept that I hold anyone in contempt when I don't. I mean, sure... there are those in my history who I've had... disagreements with, but that doesn't mean I don't still consider them friends. Just because we haven't spoken in a while doesn't mean I don't still love them like I used to.

Heck, most of these so-called "former friends" are people who have helped me through some of the most difficult times of my life. That means a lot to me. It really does.

So for any of you "former friends" who read this: I still love you. I'd still love to hear from you. I still worry about you, wonder if you're okay. And for those of you who I've hurt in the past, I'm sorry.

Valentine's Day Thoughts

With V-Day coming up soon, I've been thinking a lot about what it means to me and V-Days of yesteryear. I figured I'd write up a blog entertaining these thoughts and with some helpful hints for those who are just STUCK in the 'what the hell do I get him/her' phase...

First off, I'll tell you about some of the worst times. One ex got me car parts for Valentine's Day. Or so he said. Quite a few ex's have plain and simple forgot. (Hey guys - at least saying "Happy Valentine's Day" is nice and doesn't cost you a thing!) And I'm pretty sure I've been dumped on at least one V-Day.

Now, for the best of times... #3 on the list would be ex-hubby #2. For our first V-Day together, he made me a homemade pizza in the shape of a heart and spelled out "I love you" in pepperoni. Table was set with candles and flowers and all that jazz. Sweet, eh? #2 on the list would be ex-hubby #1. For OUR first V-Day together, he went to my parents house (I was living with the 'rents at the time) and woke up my third-shift father (he wasn't very happy about that, but oh well) to get into my bedroom where he covered my bed in rose petals, flowers, teddy bears and chocolates. He then showed up at my place of employment (I was working that morning) and got down on one knee in the parking lot to ask me if I'd promise to marry him (promise ring in hand, of course). I didn't know about all the bedroom stuff until I got home. I about lost it that day... And for the #1 all time favorite V-Day....

Ex-fiance was in the Army, stationed in Alaska. I had been crying to him all week about the fact that I finally had someone for V-Day, but would be unable to celebrate it with him. Sure enough, on V-Day, I received a package from him with his letterman's jacket. Later that day, I received a bouquet of roses. Later that evening, when I called him to thank him for everything (and to let him know it all arrived safe and sound), I mentioned the roses. I told him, "Uh... I don't want to seem ungrateful or petty or anything, but I happened to have counted the roses. There were 11. Were there supposed to be 12?" I could practically hear him smiling on the other end of the line. "No," he said, "The 12th rose is you." *sigh* That story still makes me flutter.

Now, for those of you who are still pondering what to get your significant other for V-Day, I have a few words of advice. As a caveat, I must mention that there are, I'm sure, quite a few people out there who go for the 'traditional' gifts and just get their women diamonds, a lobster dinner, three dozen roses, a fur coat, etc., etc., etc. If my boyfriend did that I'd smack him upside the head. I don't like any of those things. But we'll call those women who like those things Category A women. For the remainder of this blog, I'll be referring to Category X women - people more like me.

It's the thought that counts. I maintain that it is TOTALLY the thought that counts. This means that gift cards are unacceptable, as they require no thought whatsoever. Now, of course, if you say, "Here, honey, I got you a gift card so we can go shopping together this weekend." well, I guess I can let that slide. However, in the same respect, I'd much rather receive a hand-made card, poorly drawn with bad poetry that properly expresses my man's feelings than some Hallmark card that he paid $5 for and spent about a minute looking for. Especially if said Hallmark card says, "Happy Birthday Grandma!" (Yes, I've seen it happen.) Bottom line, put some thought into it, people.

It doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg. Contrary to popular belief, more expensive DOES NOT equal better. Sure, if you've got the money to blow and you know she's gonna like the Rolex watch, get it. But hey, instead of the dozen roses, how about finding out what kind of flower she actually LIKES and getting her a few of those? Or give her a home-grown spa day where you pamper her - running a bath for her, giving her a massage, etc. Good ol' 'Queen for the Day' shit. Works for me.

Sex isn't always the answer. Unless you only give it up only once or twice a year, offering sex isn't really special, now is it? Granted, play your cards right and that could be a benefit....

Make a sacrifice. Is there a program that she likes to watch that is on at the same time as one of your favorite programs that you HAVE to watch every week? Sit down with her, snuggle up, a grit your teeth through her girly program for once. Do you hate going dancing? Take her out for a night on the town. And don't complain about it. The bigger the sacrifice and the less you bitch about it, the more she'll appreciate it. Believe me, she probably knows how much you hate that crap in the first place, and she'll realize you are doing this for HER.

Tell her how you feel. Whether it's in a card, in person, over the phone, in an e-mail or text, tell her how much she means to you. You should be doing this all the time anyway, but on V-Day, this is important. Don't let this V-Day go by and have her still wondering if you still care about her. (P.S. NEVER forget to at least say "Happy Valentine's Day.")

Bottom line, think about the things SHE would like - not just to receive, but also to hear, to do, to feel, to see - and then act on that. And girls, most guys like the same thing.

That's all for now. I'll write more later.

Blind but Dateless

You know, I've always secretly wanted to go on a blind date. But here's the problem. In order to go on a blind date, you need a friend willing to set you up with one of their other friends. This creates multiple problems.

#1 - Your friend needs to have a SINGLE friend of the appropriate sex.
#2 - Your friend needs to believe that the person they are setting you up with is not a total loser or jerk when it comes to relationships.
#3 - Your friend needs to believe that YOU are not a total loser or jerk when it comes to relationships.
#4 - If you're such good friends with your friend, you've probably met most of their other good friends which means that either they aren't good friends with with the person they'd want to set you up with and/or they don't know a heck of a lot about that person.
#5 - Three words - bad date retaliation.

And my biggest problem....

#6 - Your friend might not like you and think you're a total idiot or that no one should be subjected to the crazy that is you.

Of course, I say all this tongue-in-cheek. I've never asked any of my friends to set me up before. And oddly enough, no one has ever even suggested it. Then again, I don't really have a big problem finding dates, either... But it still begs the question in my mind.

Eh... gotta just stop thinking about this. It only feeds my paranoia. :P

Betty Bowers on Gas

Like many people, I subscribe to the Betty Bowers Newsletter. For those who don't know, Betty Bowers is the self-proclaimed "America's Best Christian" on the satirical website, BettyBowers.com. Her recent newsletter was concerning commercials now being produced by The American Petroleum Institute that, from what I gather from the gist of the newsletter since I haven't seen the commercial itself, seems to attempt to sooth the fears of Americans on the rising cost of gas. Betty's response made me laugh out loud.... literally. (Not many things can do that, really.)

Whether you enjoy Betty Bowers or not, I highly suggest you click on this link to the YouTube video of Betty's response to the commercial. Highly amusing and insightful. Let me know what you think.

* Warning: The YouTube video does contain some "Naughty language". Not recommended for people who are offended by the "F" word.

Random Thoughts of the Insomniac

It's 6 a.m. and I haven't been to sleep. Got a big day ahead of me with my best friend getting married today. I should probably be bright eyed and bushy-tailed, right? Ugh.

After BFF's wedding, gotta figure out whether I'm heading straight for Madtown or coming home first. Not sure what the point is in coming home, other than to save the hotel expense for the evening. Today is also another friend's birthday. Heading down to Madtown to celebrate.

PLUS, while down there, may spend time with another friend whose birthday is on Monday. Um.... Apparently some people ring in the new year differently than others? But he might be back HERE (if I know him at all) with his family. Who knows..... Haven't heard from him yet.

Well, I think I'll go apply a large mallet to my forehead and see if I can't get some rest before ALL of the festivities begin. To my BFF, congrats! To my birthday boys, the spankin's are a-comin'.

Sad news

Well, today marks the end of my run with B.A.C.A. Problems in my personal life and issues within my chapter are forcing me to turn in my patch. I hope that now I will be able to focus on the things I need to focus on and get my life back on track as it needs to be.

Wish me luck, all. I'm going to need it.

And to all my B.A.C.A. pals out there, keep up the good work. Those kids need you!

Ray

Computer Literacy is Not His Forte

Earlier this past week, my computer fried. I mean, took a complete blind leap into the void of yesteryear. Had to get a new power supply, motherboard, and processor. Basically, I replaced everything but the hard drive. Oye.

My husband, on the other hand, knows only that 'the computer was broke and now it's fixed.' He knows we've had to re-install most programs on the computer, including Windows and Microsoft Office. He also knows that, including the week-long vacation we took just prior to the computer crashing, he hadn't checked his e-mail in about two weeks. The poor boy was jonesing just a bit. So last night, I came into the bedroom and said, "I left the computer up in case you want to check your e-mail. But if you do, you better go now. It's downloading updates and it'll restart when it's done unless you hit the 'restart later' button." It was the fastest I had seen him get motivated in a while. However, he came back in only a few minutes later.

"I can't find it." He says, "It's not there anymore."

"What do you mean?" I ask. "It's Yahoo Mail. It's a website, not a program."

"It's gone." He just says. I stare at his face for a moment while my brain whirrs, trying to think Hubby-speak. I finally get up, and follow him back into the office. He sits down in the chair, and points at the computer screen, which is currently showing the desktop. "You see?" He says, "It's not there anymore." And points towards the other icons still showing on the screen.

Without a word, I lean over, grab the mouse, click on the Internet Explorer icon (yes, I use Internet Exploder, leave me alone... I like it.), go to Favorites and click on the Yahoo Mail link I put there earlier for convenience. Like "Maaaaaagic" (imagine the jazz hands, if you will) the Yahoo Mail login screen pops up.

He looks at me. "That's not how I used to get to my mail. There used to be a thingy on the main screen that I clicked on. It's not there anymore."

I'm rolling my eyes as I walk back out the door. Later that evening I realize what it was and go back into the office (after Hubby was finished checking e-mail, of course) and download Yahoo Messenger, which automatically puts not only a Yahoo Messenger icon on the desktop, but also a Yahoo Mail icon there as well.

*sigh* I go back in the bedroom and inform hubby that I have 'returned his precious icon'. I wear my new hat for the rest of the evening, even though it doesn't even come close to resembling Indiana Jones' hat, just for the effect. No one gets it but me. But that's okay. I'm used to giggling to myself by now.....