It Drives Me Crazy

I have had more than one conversation in my lifetime where I either argued about or amused myself with people discussing the proper pronunciations of English words. One of my most vivid memories about one of my best friends was when she first moved in to the house next door to my parent's home (I was living at home at the time... many moons ago).

She was from Illinois and she was going on about some of the local colloquialisms. Such as how Wisconsinites refer to water fountains as "bubblers" or soft drinks as "cokes" or "colas" as opposed to "pop". (Don't ever ask me for a pop, by the way, cuz I'll certainly give you one.) In that same conversation I said something about a bag. She told me I pronounced the word wrong. We actually argued about the pronunciation of the word "bag" so long and so vehemently that she brought out the dictionary to show me that her pronunciation was grammatically correct. I stuck to my story. I'm a stubborn little bastard.

Now, aside from "bag", I am a stickler for correct pronunciations and grammatical speaking. I tend to choose my own words quite distinctly and generally speaking, although I AM a woman, I mean precisely what I say. Unfortunately, this sometimes does involve me explaining the definition of words to people.

However, it does amuse the hell out of my husband. This is because I still use words such as "gumption". My opinion is that sometimes that is the only word that accurately describes what I am trying to say. My husband on the other hand, just shakes his head and says, "Who the hell says "gumption" anymore?" Well, the simple and obvious answer is, um, me.

So, my ponderous purveyors of prolific prose, have you had any similar experiences? What words, mispronunciations, or general misuse of terminologies have you experienced that really drive you batty?

Getting in your head

I'm currently working at a place that's a half-hour to a forty-five minute drive from my home. This leaves me a lot of time to think. Which is, on the whole, scary. It is during these drives that I get inspired to write a blog post about something which, at the time, makes a lot of sense. You notice I say "at the time" because by the time I actually get home to write the post, well.... it no longer does.

Plus, a lot of the posts I think about making will allow... how to put this... more access into my head than most people would truly desire anyways. I'll give you a "for instance".

I was thinking about how I haven't posted to my blog in a while and how I'm under a lot of stress in both my personal and professional life. I realize the number of people that can and may see my blog and I'm thinking I don't want the whole world to know about EVERYTHING in my life. I get the thought that posting a blog is kind of like giving an open invite to allow people into my head for at least a little while.

The following is a basic script of my thought process after said thought:

"I wonder if there is a room capacity for people's heads. I mean, if too many people get in, can that cause a fire hazard? What if my head is over room capacity and someone yells "fire!"? I'll bet that would give me a headache. What if someone actually starts a fire? Maybe that's what causes fevers. Hmmm.... Maybe I should take an aspirin to prevent these people from getting into my head in the first place. Does aspirin prevent people from getting in your head? I'll bet it works better than tin foil. Oooooh. What about an aspirin COVERED in tin foil? Screw you government, gimme a Bayer and some Reynolds Wrap."

See? You don't really want to read about the things that go on in my head. So the next time I haven't posted in a while, I wouldn't complain if I were you.

Try Jesus

So I'm in the parking lot at a local pharmacy today when I see a bumper sticker that says in big, bold letters "Try Jesus" with other stuff written underneath it. Now, even driving at parking lot speeds, I didn't have time to read what the subscript was.

So, apparently, my brain made it up. To me, it read like "Try Jesus. He stays crunchy, even in milk!" I giggled to myself for the next ten minutes.

Does this mean I'm weird?

This can't be right....

I'm an Uber Cool Non-Nerd

Dang thing says that I've taken this quiz before, but I haven't. Who's been using my computer? :P